Pick up your mat

So why is it that when the Lord heals us of anything, we act as though nothing has changed. Maybe i am alone in this thought, but i have seen it in my life... often. I think it has a lot to do with an excuse mentality. We are all carrying or have carried something wether that be a sin struggle, a past triumph, a hardship, anything, we have all carried or are carrying something that is heavy and we take it with us everywhere. 

There is a story in John 5 about a man who had an infirmity for thirty- eight years who was sitting at the Pool of Bethesda. Jesus saw the man and asks, 

"Do you want to be made well? The sick man answered Him, 'Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, but while I am coming, another steps down before me.' "

Jesus asks a man who has been sick for almost 40 years if he wants to be made well and he responds with an excuse! The solution is in front of him, but he can only focus on why he can't. Jesus then responds,  

"Rise up, Take your mat and walk. And immediately the man was made well, took up his mat, and walked." 

I read this story and think this man is crazy, i'd say YES SIR i want to be made well hello? but than i realize i am usually the man on the mat. Everyday Jesus sits with me and says do you want to be made well? do you want me to carry that? do you want that to be lifted? Do you want me to take that lie and give you truth? and we hold on to what is now "comfortable" and we make an excuse when the cure is in front of us. I am reading a book called The Christian Atheist by Craig Groeschel and he talks about this man and how when we don't think things in our life can change, it is because we are continually making excuses and not paying attention to surrendering to the solution.

John doesn't finish the story here, he says the man takes up his mat and walks. He does not receive Jesus's healing and continues sitting on his mat when he is made well to get up and live! No, he takes the mat he has always been sitting on and he walks away with it. Imagine the testimonies we would have to proclaim the grace of God if we would take what Jesus has made well in our lives and use it to tell of his goodness! I do not want to sit another day on my mat of comfort, telling Christ the cross wasn't enough for me because he has made me well, and i will take my mat and use it for His glory. No more excuses. The Lord has made us well, now what do we do with it?

We get to change the world!

the idle clock

All year long i long for summer. I have a mental list of all the things i want to do but never have time for. Now summer is here, time is plenty, and that mental note seems to have completely disappeared. I realize during less busy seasons how much i love having a task or job or anything even if it's just reading itself. Before school got out during finals week i had a surprisingly large amount of extra time. I spent my time basically almost daily at Sweet Eugene's meeting with people i do not always get a lot of time to see and reading, a lot. After about 3 days of this i started feeling to spiritually dry thus so thirsty!

I didn't understand why i wasn't being fed and staying full on Gods Word. Then one day the Lord took me to Colossians 3:5

Walk in wisdom toward those who are outside, redeeming the time.

See that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil - -  Ephesians 5:15-17 

I had never heard of redeeming the time, and began learning that it meant to buy back, to rescue time. Verse 14 says,

Awake you who sleep, Arise from he dead, And Christ will give you light.

(does this not get you pumped?) We are all called to use our short piece of time on this earth wisely because this is the only time we will ever have to serve the Lord, one day we will be with him in GLORY so this IS the time!
Proverbs 19:15, says an idle person will suffer hunger and in proverbs 31: 27,

She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness

The virtuous wife and woman is a busy woman, one who does not partake in idleness. Being the busy person i am, this got me pumped. It was time i stared rescuing time i lose by simply not acknowledging the value in it. Although i was spending time in the Word i was not being fed because i had so much idle time and spent the rest of it reading, but my idle time was great. I was so thankful the Lord showed me this truth before summer. I always want to be hungry for Gods word, but i want to always feed me. Now this is not to say relaxing and not having a schedule is bad, in fact i think it is  incredibly healthy for those season, however, i believe in those seasons our time should be filled with God and that should be our plan.

So what is your idle clock ticking towards? Netflix? Sleeping all day? It is time to WAKE up and arise, because the King is coming to redeem the time and to take us back and He is coming soon. I don't want to waste another idle minute, because the clock is continually ticking.

 

the dirt i wear

Be the gift for those you love!

I would be straight up lying if i said the holidays weren't a bit of a temptation for me. I mean do not get me wrong the holidays and i are real close friends, however, at the end of the day there is still this piece of me that feels almost dirty….

Shiny lights, beautiful green wreaths, no class, the constant aroma of cinnamon and just sugar,
the sound of Irving Berlin's White Christmas soundtrack, the gathering of friends and family, the giving, the getting….where is the dirt? Two days ago while enjoying all of these i was overcome by a  huge presence of dissatisfaction. I can say a thousand times in my head "Samantha, but what is all of this about, why do we get to enjoy all of this" and every time i will point it back to Him, but every time i will still get a bit caught up, and that is when i get a big slap in the face and drop to my knees in thanksgiving.

How scary would this world be if things satisfied us more than THE King? I don't always see it, but what a blessing He has given to let Himself be the only thing that satisfies, that we don't have to chase multiple things, but one thing, and when we do go chasing that He gives us an unsettling heart to lead us back home, to stop the chase.

i like to run….but that would be exhausting.

As i embark on Christmas endeavors i want the only dirt that i feel to be the the dirt that resembles the absolute meekness of the birth of our King, the simple and not glamorous stable He was born in. I don't believe there were many things that were clean that day, and so that is the dirt i want to coat myself in as i walk through this season.

Lord thank you for being a God that satisfies and the only thing that truely satisfies, for being a father that gives me someone to run back to when i've tested the waters that are unfulfilling, thank you for giving me one reason to run and one direction to run in. How beautiful are you!

the GOSPEL

Oh GOD, full of beauty, full of grace

who sent His son to die in my place

took beating, slashes, and wood to his back,

not only mine, but the entire worlds that were stack 

with every nail, one of my spots fell off

until all His blood shed was enough

as He breathed His last our doubt was great

and how we can still disbelieve, i do hate

But His love was greater than death

down to the enemys home He took the keys and He left

He opened the gates to our true eternal place

While meeting with His father face to face

But He didn't leave us here alone, 

He gave us His spirit, were all His power is shown

filled with His consuming fire and might

it's the means by which we can be called light

accompanied with the sword of His Spirit we go forth every day

winning lives for His kingdom along the way

until the day He comes back or calls us home

we stand tall on the only sturdy stone

we live and wait only for you 

because you O God are all we know to be true.

What happened to because?

Amongst the steam of the espresso machine, the anxiety sighs of test minded college students, and garbage magazines sits a man reading Hemingway amongst a dozen chocolate wrappers. Besides his 10 year cargo pants and 60's sporting cap, this man is wearing the things in life he enjoys, he is wearing simplicity. As his friend tries to converse with him over his Machiatto, this man continues to read hoping that with the next turn of his page his friend will leave him to his literature.

Amongst a world of doing things because [insert worldly reasoning here]…..he is doing things because he enjoys it. What happened to enjoying a book because of the beauty that is the story, and not the end grade, what happened to intentional conversation, because the desire to learn about someones heart is greater than the need to fill an empty time gap of words, what happened to because?

I'm learning the beauty that is in the things that my heart loves and doing them because of the joy it gives me alone. Why waste another second doing something not worth while when you can spend it doing something that YOU want to do because it's what you want to do. How has the world completely made us feel like if we don't live by their rules we're wasting time or doing something wrong. NO. I mean the Lord gave us each unique and beautiful things that only OUR hearts desire, so living by the rules of the world will NEVER fill the desires of our hearts and will ALWAYS leave us unsatisfied. God wrote the rules, and the world is trying to break them, yet we are slow to call them out on it. So maybe no one will understand why i love sitting at central market on a saturday morning with my best friend who is almost a decade older than me, when i could be catching up on my non existent sleep, maybe no one will understand my desire to live in Angola, Africa amongst a people group that could kill me tomorrow, maybe no one will ever understand why i'd take a drive to Alaska and back just to say i did it despite the gas and the tests i have the next week, and maybe no one will understand how a mid 70's year old man would compel me to start writing despite the 5 chapters of homework i need to read….but i desire it because….because just that, The Lord put it there and this life is way too short to waste it filling it with what the world says is needed.

 "Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God! Therefore the world does not know us, because it did not know Him." -1 john 3:1

I am a child of God, i am unique, i am not like his other children, so i will not live like his other children, because i am not them, i am me. The world might not understand my life, but it's because i am not living by their standards.  I'm living by His.

On my way to Ephesus ….

Okay i'm just going to spit it out raw...

so i have been wrecked from every piece of flesh in my being by the all consuming powerful, captivating love and redemption of The Holy Spirit who is JESUS CHRIST. 

yeah. 

Lets take it back a few steps….. My recent time with the Lord has revolved around a door, a door you say? yes, i was confused to. 

"I know your works and have set before you an open door, and no one can shut it for you have a little strength have kept my word and have not denied my name." - Revelations 3:3

" But i will tarry in Ephesus until Pentecost. For a great and effective door has opened to me and there are many adversaries…"  - 1 corinthians 16: 9-10                                                                                                

So, i am continually asking and praying for the Lord to just show me what this door was, what were the adversaries that were going to come up against it? Naturally i get frustrated when the Lord decides to be his beautiful self and only reveal himself to me in his good timing, so i began to ask him to speak boldly to me and, to rock my world with an interpretation of this message….this is where he takes me. 

"Then He said, "Go out, and stand on the mountain before the Lord." And behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice. " -1 kings 19:11-12

God did not reveal himself to Elijah in a spectacle, but instead with gentleness. I then decided okay, Lord i will be patient, i mean you've kind of made it clear….

Weeks pass

Then this weekend i attending a missions conference called World Mandate held by the Antioch Church in Waco, Texas. This is where the Lord changed my life!

During worship a friend of mine speaks truth to me on the Holy Spirit and his power and reads to me scripture,  which reads.

"So i say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you." - Luke 11:9

See Paul was planning a journey to Corinth, however the Lord opened an unexpected and effective door in Ephesus for him, and these past few weeks i have felt as though i am on my way to Ephesus, a place i was not expecting to go or dwell in on my way through life; to Corinth. So i have been knocking, inquiring the Lord to reveal and open up this door to me and he did and behind that door was the Holy Spirit and just like Paul waiting until Pentecost, i was waiting for the Holy Spirit to fall upon me. The door was finally able to open to me despite the enemy trying to press against it; my adversary. 

An incredible door has opened up to me, it has changed my life forever, i am forever changed. Never stop knocking because i finally made it to Ephesus and now i face forward journeying to my next destination on the way to Corinth. 

 

The dream

A few things worth sharing…and yes it's about Bali (i know i'm so sorry….i can't help myself)

• The Balinese students all bring brooms to school and they were completely shocked to find out we one do not bring brooms to school, and two do not spend time cleaning the school ourselves.
• The balinese keep their ethanol for their motor bikes in vodka bottles along the side of the road.

the vodka bottles filled with ethanol

We spent the last day of our trip on the beautiful beach of Jimbaran. This was an incredible scenic and breathtaking beach, however, no one was on the beach for the majority of the day until the sun began to set. All of a sudden the entire city and all the many resort guests were present. I couldn't help but think where in the world these people were possibly hiding all day…? It's so interesting, we [americans/europeans] come to Bali and fall in love with the peace of the villages and the simplicity of their life although completely acknowledging how difficult their life is, while at the same time their dreams are going to Las Vegas and Beverly Hills, whatever media shows them on television is the life, and "America"… When in reality it is all fleeting because at the end of the day the thing that everyone comes back to is the sunset on the beach in Jimbaran. In the end its all God. Apart from God nothing is lasting, nothing satisfies. The world is so desperate for him, if something like the simplicity of a beautiful sunset can send people running to it, can cause people to revolve their schedules around it. i can't imagine the revolution it was cause for people to know all of Him, every bit of his beauty, the warm sunset that is his spirit everyday.

"America that's the dream" they all say, but that's not it at all, man its so much better, so much greater!